Nicole Eggert
Nude

Quintessential California girl Nicole Eggert went from winning the petit category of Miss Universe at age five, to starring in TV ads for Johnson’s Baby Shampoo to becoming a quintessential cast member of various classic ’70s shows, all before she hit puberty. In fact, viewers got to watch her grow up (and out) on T.J. Hooker, Who’s the Boss? and most famously, Charles in Charge. As Jamie Powell, thoughts of young Nicole’s burgeoning blonde beauty were in charge of our days and our nights, but once the ingénue was (finally!) legal, she sizzled in Home Fires (1992) and scorched up the small screen in her poky-showing red swimsuit as Summer Quinn on Baywatch. If you wondered why the blonde’s breasts were unusually boulder-like for her frame, it’s because she had implants. But they were very well done, and implanted filthy thoughts in our brains whenever we saw them jiggle. Nicole gave her best stripped-down performance in the appropriately titled Blown Away (1992) when she revealed her pre-silicone rack and rump to Corey Haim. No doubt the highlight of his career was having his face between her legs, and her straddling his naked body, tenderizing his meat in a dirty Haim sandwich in the erotic thriller. Alas, the arousing actress let a body double expose “her” naked T&A in The Haunting of Morella (1990) and bare breasts in Secret Sins (1995). After donning skintight latex in The Demolitionist (1995), skimpy skivvies in Frequent Flyer (1996) and a bikini in Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding (2003), Nicole proved baby got back (and side boob) in Wall of Secrets (2003). By 2006, Ms. Eggert flashed her flesh while taking a pregnancy test in the comedy Dead Lenny (2006) and rocked a thong in National Lampoon’s Cattle Call (2006). Since then, she appeared in barely-there swimwear on ABC’s celebrity diving competition Splash!, which made us all reach for a towel! While we got years of enjoyment from Nicole’s enhanced knick-knockers, she wasn’t happy with their size later in life, so in 2015 she appeared on Botched and had a plastic surgeon reduce her breast size. She still looks great, and we’d be happy to check out whenever she opts to show off the new body. For an entire generation of young boys who came of age in the seventies, there is no paradox. We came first, choking the chicken to Nicole Eggert!